QUIPS

A Brief History of Victoria Beckham’s Most Delightful Quips and Quotes

“I’m going to try and smile more for America.”

by Steph Eckardt

davd-and-victoria-beckham.jpg
Photo by Steven Klein for W Magazine August 2007.

“I think rules are there to be broken,” Victoria Beckham once informed passersby in Central Park, where she appeared via webcam to dole out her sartorial advice.

That’s but one drop in a bucket of irreverence Beckham has accumulated over the course of what is officially 45 years on this planet on Wednesday. Her look may have come a long way since she was known as Posh Spice, but her dry sense of humor‘s always been there—even before she started broadcasting it on slogan tees that read, in a troll of her Internet trolls, “Fashion Stole My Smile.”

Victoria Beckham wearing her infamous “Fashion Stole My Smile” T-shirt at LAX.

Getty Images

Another thing she’s proven over the years: She always gets the last laugh. “For a long time there, I was a bit of a laughingstock. And while everybody was busy laughing, what was I doing? I was laying the foundation to what I have in place now,” Beckham told Business of Fashion in 2014. (Three years later, that would include an OBE.) In celebration of her birthday, revisit more of Beckham’s most quotable gems, here.

On mortality: “I’m not scared of death. I never wear a seatbelt on a plane.”—on dvbstyle.com

On looking miserable: “If I really was as miserable as I look in some of those paparazzi pictures, my children wouldn’t be as happy as they are. And I certainly wouldn’t be married anymore.”—in Vogue Netherlands

On being pulled over after making an illegal turn: “The policeman was gorgeous. And he loved my shoes.”—in W

On what she would say to her 18-year-old self: “You are not the prettiest, or the thinnest, or the best at dancing at the Laine Theatre Arts college. You have never properly fitted in, although you are sharing your Surrey school digs with really nice girls. You have bad acne.”—in Vogue UK

On her singing career: “I was never going to give Mariah Carey any competition.”—in Marie Claire

On her son Brooklyn‘s hair: “@chloegmoretz what have u done!!”—on Instagram

On her hidden talent: “The most popular thing I make in my kitchen is a mango carved into a hedgehog. I do that and the kids tell everyone I’m an amazing cook.”—in The Guardian

On Americans: “I think [Americans] have this impression that I’m this miserable cow who doesn’t smile. But I’m actually quite the opposite.”—in W

On America: “I’m going to try and smile more for America.”—in W

On first meeting David Beckham: “I didn’t really know who he was. I was never into football.”—in W

On…getting to know David Beckham: “He does have a huge one…It’s like a tractor exhaust pipe.”—in GQ

David and Victoria Beckham: American Idols

Victoria Beckham wears an Yves Saint Lauren embroidered black silk charmeuse dress; Brooks Brothers white cotton tank top. Her own bra. David Beckham wears Acne Jeans blue cotton denim jeans. Gucci sunglasses; Frye boots.

American Apparel nude cotton and spandex jersey leotard. On him: Daang Goodman for Tripp black cotton pants.

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VPL nylon and spandex bra; nylon, spandex and cotton bodysuit; polyester and cotton briefs and belt. Alexander McQueen boots. On him: New York Fetish latex pants. Giles & Brother by Philip Crangi necklace over his own necklace; Made Her Think bracelet.

Agent Provocateur nude silk, nylon and elastane bra and briefs. On him: Dolce & Gabbana white nylon and elastane briefs.

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Hermès black polyamide and elastane swimsuit. Alexander McQueen boots. On him: DSquared black cotton and nylon pants.

Just Cavalli leather pants.

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Dolce & Gabbana nylon and polyamide maillot. On him: Adam Kimmel wool and cashmere cape.

The Beckhams in 2003.

Photographer: WWD Staff

The Beckhams with Giorgio Armani at the Met Costume Institute gala.

Photographer: Steve Eichner

Victoria Beckham and Jennifer Lopez at the Marc Jacobs Spring ’09 show.

Photographer: Steve Eichner

Victoria Beckham and Jennifer Lopez at the Marc Jacobs afterparty.

Photographer: Steve Eichner

An image from a Marc Jacobs campaign starring Victoria Beckham.

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On being thin: “Some women ask if I’m so thin because I shag all day. And I say, ‘Actually, yes! And I bet you would too if you were married to David Beckham.'”—in OK! (via CelebsNow)

On footwear: “I can’t concentrate in flats.”—in Glamour

On her gender identity: “I’m a gay man in a woman’s body…You’ve read all the rumors about me. Some people aren’t satisfied that I’m a gay man in a woman’s body and swear that I’m secretly a real boy. Let’s clear that one up. I’m a real woman.”—in Marie Claire

On her relationship: “What’s David’s role? David looks good, that’s what David does. David looks good, and I’m the funny one, that’s what I hear constantly. But I keep telling him that looks fade.”—in The Cut

A Celebration of Victoria Beckham’s Signature Beauty Through the Years

Beckham wears her brunette pixie with tousled bags and a light contour on the cheekbones with a nude glossy lip at the Spice Girls launch book “Forever Spice” event in London. (1999)

Photo by Getty.

Wearing her hair swept over in voluminous, tousled waves with a nude glossy lip, Beckham attends the Elle Style Awards in London. (2000)

Photo by Getty.

Beckham wears her tousled, highlighted locks in a loose, half up with with luminous skin at the Rock & Republic Spring 2005 fashion show.

Photo by Getty.

Beckham goes blonde with an ultra sleek pixie cut paired with a taupe smoky eye at the Graduate Fashion Week photo call. (2007)

Photo by Getty.

Beckham returns to her brunette locks wearing an asymmetrical bob with a brown smoky eye and a nude glossy lip. (2007)

Mike Marsland

Wearing her sleek pixie cut with an exaggerated dark smoky eye, Beckham arrives at the 17th Annual Elton John Aids Foundation Party. (2009)

Photo by Getty.

At the British Fashion Awards in 2010, Beckham wears a naturally tousled up do with a taupe smoky eye and a luminous skin.

Photo by Getty.

Victoria Beckham looked sleek with lots of black eyeliner and a teased up do at the British Fashion Awards 2011.

Photo by Getty.

Beckham let pieces loose out of a slightly voluminous pony tail at the Vanity Fair and Chrysler celebration of The Eva Longoria Foundation. (2013)

Photo by Getty.

Attending the 5th Global Gift Gala, Beckham wears her shiny, polished curls side-parted with a dark taupe eyeshadow and a matte nude lip.

Photo by Getty.

Attending the British Fashion Awards in 2015, Beckham wears an elegant up do with loose pieces framing her face, full brows and a grey smoky eye.

Photo by Getty.

Wearing her asymmetrical, long bob in tousled curls with a dark grey smokey eye, the fashion designer attends the launch of “Vogue: Voice Of A Century”book event. (2017)

Photo by Getty.
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On menswear: “Don’t men look better with their clothes off?”—in The Cut

On her $22 million mansion in Beverly Hills: “I had quite a lot of things to get my head around. What was the nicest area? I was very much like, ‘Okay, the seaside is down there, training is there, school is there, and I think Barneys is over there.’ I kind of did it like that…We didn’t want anything too huge, too fancy, too ostentatious.”—in W

On which part of Beverly Hills the $22 million mansion is in: “The best.”—in W

Related: David Beckham Says His Marriage to Victoria Beckham Is “Hard Work”