Ciara and Gwyneth Paltrow Get Candid About Motherhood

The singer and entrepreneur Ciara and the actress and Goop head honcho Gwyneth Paltrow just sat down for in-depth, heart-to-heart chat. For a new episode of Coach Conversations, the brand’s YouTube series that invites stars like Michael B. Jordan and Lindsay Peoples Wagner to participate in talks on culture and community, the two entertainers got together to discuss modern motherhood. In their conversation, Ciara and Paltrow trade stories and lessons they’ve gleaned by raising children: what it means to be a mom today, what their mothers taught them, and how they find balance as working moms while also staying true to their desires as human beings.

If their interview with one another proves anything, it’s that Ciara and Paltrow have more in common than you might think. Being moms bonds them, of course. But talking about staying mentally and physically well amid busy lifestyles resonated with Ciara particularly, who spoke with W magazine via Zoom from a “comfy corner” of her studio this week. Surrounded by black and white pillows, the musician—who also stars in Coach’s Mother’s Day campaign flanked by her kids Future, Sienna, and Win—delved into her discussion with Paltrow, recalling their talk about wellness specifically. How do the two women respond to especially tough days, when the children are driving their sleep-deprived moms up the wall?

“As parents, your job is never-ending. It can be mentally challenging for any mom, no matter how great you are, no matter how awesome your kids are,” she said. “Something that I enjoyed in our conversation was encouraging moms to know that the imperfect moments are actually a part of the perfect process of motherhood. It’s okay to have the not-so-pretty days in parenting and in motherhood; it’s important to remind every mom about that.”

“And sometimes you’ve got to just take a deep breath,” she added. “When the days are hectic, I just literally take a deep breath. I take a pause before responding to my kids. Ten times out of 10, you make it through the day.”

Putting that credo into action can be easier said than done. But Ciara noted a way that she and husband Russell Wilson make it happen is by “finding unique ways to say no.”

“We always talk about how your no’s have got to be no’s, and that's important. That’s hard sometimes, but kids are so resilient and consistency is everything,” Ciara said. “Your children challenge you, and you challenge them back. If we can be consistent and persistent, and always put a touch of love in there, it all works itself out. We also have to give grace to ourselves in the process—it’s not going to be perfect.”

The topics Paltrow and Ciara touch on in the episode, which will be released on Coach’s YouTube channel today at 12 PM EST, don’t stop at motherhood. The two discussed dancing (“The moms in my family know how to move,” Ciara said at one point, to which Paltrow responded, “Not in my family, we’re stiff, old, white ladies.”), acting (Paltrow wants to do a Broadway play, Ciara aspires to star in an action film), and little-known facts about themselves (“[I] have a really, really dirty sense of humor,” Paltrow revealed.). But a large portion of their dialogue centers their own mothers, and the things they’ve learned from them.

“I’ll never forget when I had my daughter Apple, the incredible rush of love that I had for her,” Paltrow said. “I said to my mother, almost in shock, ‘Do you love me this much?’ It reframed completely how I saw motherhood.”

According to Ciara, her mother’s headstrong, feisty traits have been passed onto her and her daughter Sienna, who just turned four this April (“She’s a Taurus,” she added. “Y’all are one of a kind, stubborn as a mule.”). When asked what her plans for Mother’s Day are, Ciara recalled a particularly special Mother’s Day, which took place four years ago, right after she’d given birth to Sienna.

“Oftentimes, Russ surprises me. This time he took me to this beautiful property in Idaho,” she said. “It was so simple; we didn't do a whole lot—we made little porcelain, painted piggy banks and played outside with the kids. It was so sweet just being there with them.”

She hopes this year’s celebration will be just as low key. “It doesn't matter where we are. Just being at home and having a nice, cool, brunch—I’m content with that, as long as I’m with them.”